Father’s Day can be difficult for some. Recently I decided to take a risk in our 50’s plus social group from church. There were only twelve of us. Some I knew well while others were new to me. How do we prepare for Father’s Day and focus on sharing pleasant moments?
I didn’t know if all the men in the room were dads. But we all had dads. I asked: What are your memorable dad moments? Oh no, I thought. Some may not have pleasant memories of their dads. Or, being a dad right now may be a painful thing. I wanted to honor them. Not remind them of difficulties.Pleasant memories open up special places in our hearts. Click To Tweet
As each person shared, it seemed we all opened up special places in our hearts. Those who are dads answered from their experiences of fathering children. Those who weren’t dads answered from memories of their dad.
Pleasant Moments from Fathers
Here’s what the fathers in the group said:
With a twinkle in his eyes, Sid said, “It was the moment she was born.”
Dave said, “The memory that tugs at my heart was the day I sent each child off to their first day of kindergarten.”
William said, “It would have been easier to tell my four-year-old son not to touch the stereo equipment. Instead I showed him how to use it and press the right buttons. That was a challenge because it was before the technology of remote controls.”
Tony said, “I’ve always had a great relationship with my daughter. And I’ve not held back from giving her clear expectations and boundaries.” And he gave more details about what to do and not to do on her first date with a boy.
Mark said, “I’ve never been a father. But when I volunteered my time to read to elementary school children, it was like a father spirit opened up in me.” Mark shared more about his love of reading to children. He’s written a couple of children’s books. He loves being in the presence of young children.
Pleasant Memories of Fathers
Jean said with a little girl smile on her face, “I remember when my dad came home from work. I would run to him. He swept me up in his arms.”
“My dad had so much patience. He ran along side my bike while I learned how to ride.” Karen said.
“I followed my dad around the yard,” Jenny said. “One of his friends told him to enjoy it now because it wouldn’t last. He appreciated hanging out with me.”
“My dad drove the boat while I water skied,” said John. “He liked to joke around with me.”
Joe shared that his dad knelt down by his bedside each night to pray with him.
Finally, my friend Karen said, “What are your pleasant dad memories, Judy?”
“Well, my dad died when I was a small child,” I said. “And I do have memories of him teaching me how to ride my bike.” I have few memories about my dad. He died a young man of 28 years within six weeks of his diagnosis of cancer. I’ve learned more from family members about my dad. Here’s what they’ve said as we shared old family photos.
- Yes, that’s how I remember Bill – always smiling, laughing, light-hearted.
- Judy, now I know where you get your smile.
- He was my favorite brother who took time to understand me.
Beyond our own Fathers
Beyond our own dads, I want to honor others. I think pleasant thoughts of my children’s dad, and the fathers of my grandchildren. I’m proud of my youngest son who faithfully reads to my youngest grand daughter each night.
I think of my dad substitutes over the years.
- Grandfather whom I cried bucket-loads of tears when he passed away at 94.
- Stepdad, Bob who has taken that dad role in my life as an adult.
- Father-in-law who was Papa to my four children.
- Uncle Ken who’s been the “icon” dad in my life, although I’ve not told him so. His words as the foreword of my e-book were a gift from God to me.
I’m glad I asked the question, What are your memorable dad moments? I came away appreciating the fathers represented in our 50’s social group.
What pleasant father memories do you have?